mardi 31 juillet 2007

Message des ressources humaines...

Étant donné que j'entre plus souvent qu'autrement dans la catégorie INSTEAD OF, un gestionnaire de projets vient de m'envoyer ceci au bureau:

*****************

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals
throughout the company have been using foul language during the normal
conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received from some
employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer
be tolerated. We do however realize the critical importance of being able to
accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.

Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases has been
provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an
effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a ball-busting b__ch.

3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f______ way.

5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh__ing me!

6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f______ problem.

8) TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.

10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the f____ didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.

13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F___ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This job sucks.

17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the h___ died and made you boss?

18 ) TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.

Thank You,
Human Resources

22 commentaires:

Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Comment je doit exprimer a quel point je trouve ca ridicule ...

Y'on du temsp a perdre a ta job c'est fou .

Je suis convaincue que tu peux relever le defit du moins je l'espere =P

1 août 2007 à 10 h 55  
Blogger Jonny King a dit...

On trouve de tout sur internet! même des messages pré-faite des ressources humaines!

2 août 2007 à 10 h 05  
Blogger iBen a dit...

@Genny: C'était plus une joke lol!

@Jonny: Mais c'était bon comme joke :P

3 août 2007 à 07 h 30  
Blogger Une Corneillle a dit...

Haha!!!
Je me vois très bien envoyer ce genre de truc au staff! Mais avec leur niveau d'humour, je serai la "encore plus weird-freak-jamais-vue" au bureau...

3 août 2007 à 10 h 58  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Howdy

I just joined this lovely place. I found loads of useful information here. Please accept my little contribution towards community. I would like to share some [url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/lose-10-pounds-in-2-weeks-quick-weight-loss-tips]quick weight loss tips[/url]. If you need to know how to lose 10 lbs in a calendar week, you are probably not searching for a regular dieting and exercise plan. You can lose weight with a standard diet and exercise plan, Still this demands a lot of time doing intensive cardio workouts and following a strict diet. Here I will draft the right steps that I took to lose 10 pounds in just a workweek.

1. Keep Distance from all deep-fried nutrients for the week
2. Drink In an 8oz glass of grapefruit with breakfast each day. (this speeds up your metabolism)
3. Consume fair portions (stop consuming when you are full)
4. Instead of taking 3 large a meals a day, consume 5-6 smaller meals to keep your metabolism up and keep your body burning fat.
5. Aviod your habbit of eating after 9 P.M.. Calories do not burn, when you eat so late.
6. Have a proper sleep everyday. Not taking adequate rest has been proven to be a ranking element to the body putting up excess fat.
7. Use a body/colon clean for the 7 days. This will get rid of extra fat stored close to the tummy area as well as cleanse your body of harmfull pollutants that makes you store fat and feel tired. Flush away excess pounds around the stomach area that otherwise would be hard to lose.
8. I advice you using Acai Berry Diet Pills. This one is tested to work, and you can get a free trial.
9. For those mens/womens who desire to burn fat quickly, avoid alcohol.
10[url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com/lose-10-pounds-in-2-weeks-quick-weight-loss-tips].[/url] A low GI diet is an superior method of loosing fat quickly.

Thanks![url=http://www.weightrapidloss.com].[/url]!

6 février 2010 à 12 h 44  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Wanna Get HIGH? Running out of Supply? Then Check Out My Shit!
>>>>> http://bestlegalhighsdrugs.info <<<<
If you have questions, you can email my boy at online.mentor [at] gmail.com


[size=1] IGNORE THIS----------------------------
salvis divinoruk ecsgasy ills [url=http://bestlegalhighsdrugs.info] legal highs online [/url] evstasy pulls hair drug analysis [url=http://buybudshoplegalherbs.info] legal herbs[/url] facts about the salvia coccinea amaniga musscaria [url=HTTP://BUYINGMARIJUANASALE.INFO] Order Marijuana [/url] meth cook cstasy pills [url=HTTP://BUYLEGALBUDSCOMREVIEWS.INFO] buy legal buds [/url] meth addicts stories methampheramine [url=HTTP://CANNABISHIGH-PILLSHIGH.INFO] Ganja Effects[/url] leggal vuds amanitta musfaria [url=HTTP://HOWTOBUYWEED-BUYINGWEED.INFO] how to buy marihuana[/url] salviaa dviinorum Ecstasy Definition [url=http://legalbud.drugreviews.info] legalbuds [/url]

leegal bdus kratom plants [url=http://legalweed.lamodalatina.com] legalweeds [/url] crstal meth ectsasy ppills [url=http://buysalvia.lamodalatina.com] buy salvia divinorum[/url] amaniita mmuscaria aalvia divinorrum
[url=http://reviewsoflegalbudscams.blogsome.com] order legal weeds [/url]
your drug test salvai duvinorum [url=http://legalweed.lamodalatina.com] legal weeds [/url] detoxification program sakvia divinorrum [url=http://buysalviacheap.com] get salvia extract[/url] salvi divinorumm bufk aalvarius
[url=http://guaranteedheightincrease.info/]height improvement[/url] - http://guaranteedheightincrease.info/
height enhancement - http://guaranteedheightincrease.info
[url=http://provenpenisenlargement.info/]proven penis lengthening[/url] - http://provenpenisenlargement.info/
proven penis enhancement - http://provenpenisenlargement.info/
[url=http://provenskincareadvice.info/]skin care tips[/url] - http://provenskincareadvice.info/
skin care advice - http://provenskincareadvice.info/
[url=http://getrichgambling.info/]get riches gambling[/url] - http://getrichgambling.info/
get rich gambling - http://getrichgambling.info/
[url=http://herpesoutbreak-gentalwarts.info/]herpes outbreak[/url] - http://herpesoutbreak-gentalwarts.info/
herpes outbreak - http://herpesoutbreak-gentalwarts.info/
[url=http://STOP-PREMATURE-EJACULATION-SOLUTIONS.INFO]stop premature ejaculation[/url] - http://STOP-PREMATURE-EJACULATION-SOLUTIONS.INFO
stop premature ejaculation - http://STOP-PREMATURE-EJACULATION-SOLUTIONS.INFO
[url=http://3GMOBILEPHONESFORSALE.INFO]mobile cellphones on sale[/url] - http://3GMOBILEPHONESFORSALE.INFO
mobile cellphones on sale - http://3GMOBILEPHONESFORSALE.INFO
[url=http://internationaloddities.reviewsdiscountsonline.com] international oddities scam[/url]
international oddities
[url=http://drobuds.reviewsdiscountsonline.com]dro bud [/url]
dro buds reviews
[url=http://bestacnetreatmentreviews.info] acne treatment reviews[/url] http://bestacnetreatmentreviews.info
acne treatment review http://bestacnetreatmentreviews.info
[url=HTTP://LEARN-HYPNOSIS-ONLINE.INFO]learn hypnosis online[/url]
learn hypnosis online

10 février 2010 à 02 h 21  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Which i was looking at this web site and have found it to be pretty beneficial. I would greatly value any help.

Just lately, Louisville has came about as a major heart for the health care and health-related sciences establishments. Louisville has been key to progress in heart and hand surgical procedure as well as cancer healing. A few of the earliest artificial cardiovascular system transplants were made in Louisville. Louisville's booming downtown medical research campus comprises of the unique $88 million rehab middle, and a well-being sciences exploration and commercialization recreation area which, in conjunction with the University of Louisville, has lured nearly 80 major scientists and researchers. Louisville might be also residence to Humana, 1 of the nation's greatest health insurance coverage firms.

Louisville is residence to a lot of major companies and agencies.

10 février 2010 à 14 h 09  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Hi, as you can see this is my first post here.
I will be glad to receive any assistance at the start.
Thanks and good luck everyone! ;)

12 février 2010 à 00 h 03  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Jaka jest najlepsza stronka po polsku o kredycie sms? Szukam mozliwie jak najszybciej chwilowki albo pozyczki sms.

Znalazlem ta strone, jest ona najlepsza [url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/kredyt-sms.html]kredyt sms[/url].

Licze na to ze ci to pomoglo, pozdrawiam z Polski.

16 février 2010 à 10 h 28  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

[COLOR="Red"][B]Click on the pictures to view in full size[/B][/COLOR]

[URL=http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/details.php?image_id=13383][IMG]http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/data/thumbnails/11/Katrina Kaif-314.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

[URL=http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/details.php?image_id=8825][IMG]http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/data/thumbnails/11/Katrina Kaif-309.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

[URL=http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/details.php?image_id=8822][IMG]http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/data/thumbnails/11/Katrina Kaif-306.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

[URL=http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/details.php?image_id=4238][IMG]http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/data/thumbnails/11/Katrina_Kaif-99.jpg[/IMG][/URL]


[url=http://www.wallpaperhungama.in/cat-Asin-32.htm][b]Katrina Kaif Sexy Wallpapers[/b][/url]

Photo gallery at t WallpaperHungama.in is dedicated to Katrina Kaif Pictures. Click on the thumbnails on enlarged Katrina Kaif pictures, exclusive photographs and snobbish photos. Also constraint exposed other Pictures Gallery representing Squeaky distinction and Strong Boldness image scans, film captures, talkie promos, wallpapers, hollywood & bollywood pictures, photos of actresses and celebrities

16 février 2010 à 20 h 16  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Coach is a leading American designer of luxury goodies, the whole way from handbags coach handbags to jewelry and sunglasses to shoes. The coach has been 1 of the most popular and excellent designer handbags and accessories on the market name. They are distributed through Coach 400 stores and more than 1200 joint U.S. retail. As a result of intensive marketplace competition, [url=http://www.discountoncoach.com]coach online store[/url] website, as well as retail merchants are encouraging and offering Coach handbags outlet coupons for reduced prices. These coupons are emailed to clients or it can be exploited by visiting the discount coupons offered by the company websites. You can easily find websites offering a Coach Outlet Coupon through the popular search engines. What you need to do is simply type the words "Coach Discounted Coupons" and you will get a list of sites from where you can avail promotional or discounted coupons for the purpose of buying purses and handbags of you desired brand. Some other search terms which can help you to find out a Coach Outlet Coupon include "coach shoes discount", "coach coupon codes", "coach promo codes", "coach discount handbags", "coach promotional codes", "coach purses discount", "coach bags discount", and "coach bag coupons".

To shop for fashionable [url=http://www.discountoncoach.com/coach/leather-bags]Coach Leather Bags[/url], visit [url=http://www.discountoncoach.com/coach/handbags]Coach Handbags[/url] Online Store. We give you best in the world and that too at very high discounted rate.

25 février 2010 à 12 h 43  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Hello, as you may already noticed I am recent here.
In first steps it's very good if somebody supports you, so hope to meet friendly and helpful people here. Let me know if I can help you.
Thanks and good luck everyone! ;)

25 février 2010 à 13 h 07  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

http://studencki-kredyt.pl/co.html
http://www.allforums.net/member.php?u=59698
http://www.hanp.net/phpBB2/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=41468
http://www.roadwarriorguide.com/forum/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=63225
http://forums.aetolia.com/index.php?showuser=54107
http://forum.ineedhouse.com/member.php?u=71477

http://studencki-kredyt.pl/kto.html
http://studencki-kredyt.pl/jak.html
[url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/gdzie.html]gdzie[/url]
[url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/tytan.html]tytan[/url]
[url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/wanad.html]wanad[/url]
[url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/chrom.html]chrom[/url]
http://studencki-kredyt.pl/miedz.html
[url=http://www.atomic.yoyo.pl/katar-sienny/index.html]katar sienny[/url]
[url=http://www.atomic.yoyo.pl/objawy-kataru-siennego.html]objawy kataru siennego[/url]
[url=http://www.atomic.yoyo.pl/alergeny.html]alergeny[/url]
[url=http://www.studencki-kredyt.pl/wojciech-mann.html]wojciech mann[/url]
[url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/wyszukiwarka-fobia/fobia.html.html]fobia[/url]
http://studencki-kredyt.pl/szukaj/index.html
[url=http://studencki-kredyt.pl/kredyt-dla/kredyt-dla-singli.html]kredyt dla singli[/url]

[url=http://www.studencki-kredyt.pl/]kredyt[/url]

8 mars 2010 à 14 h 36  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Good day everybody, I just signed up on this lovely discussion board and desired to say hey there! Have a memorable day!

13 mars 2010 à 03 h 49  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Greets everyone!

Watch movies without download here:
http://www.freemoviez.biz

I highly recommend it

Greets everyone!

21 mars 2010 à 11 h 29  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

are the any naked pictures of megan fox, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187756]megan fox naked cartoon[/url] megan fox sex clip
kim kardashian bikini photos, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187768]kim kardashian and ray j video porn[/url] kim kardashian wallpapers
i hate taylor swift, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187772]taylor swift sydney[/url] taylor swift wigs
baby hannah montana singers, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187786]this is the life lyrics hannah montana[/url] juegos de hannah montana
audio books download harry potter, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187792]will harry potter and hermione kiss[/url] why aunt petunia cannot tell her secret to harry potter
cruise ship to hawaii, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187798]cruise departing san francisco going to mexico[/url] celebrity cruise what to pack europe
justin beeber, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187812]how do you pronounce justin biebers name[/url] justin beiber baby
britney spears crotch split, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/187814]britney spears perfect body[/url] britney spears lyrics 3
topless megan fox, [url=http://discuss.tigweb.org/thread/175542]hot pics of megan fox[/url] megan fox having fun
gehjfrgghh

22 mars 2010 à 08 h 19  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

if you guys requisite to informed [url=http://www.generic4you.com]viagra[/url] online you can do it at www.generic4you.com, the most trusted viagra pharmacopoeia advantageously of generic drugs.
you can descry drugs like [url=http://www.generic4you.com/Sildenafil_Citrate_Viagra-p2.html]viagra[/url], [url=http://www.generic4you.com/Tadalafil-p1.html]cialis[/url], [url=http://www.generic4you.com/VardenafilLevitra-p3.html]levitra[/url] and more at www.rxpillsmd.net, the frequency [url=http://www.rxpillsmd.net]viagra[/url] start on the web. well another great [url=http://www.i-buy-viagra.com]viagra[/url] pharmacy you can find at www.i-buy-viagra.com

11 avril 2010 à 10 h 10  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

You have to visit [url=http://www.denisecam.com]www.DeniseCam.com[/url] if you want to enjoy the best adult webcams.

12 avril 2010 à 14 h 31  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Easily, the post is in reality the greatest on this laudable topic. I concur with your conclusions and will eagerly look forward to your upcoming updates. Saying thanks will not just be sufficient, for the tremendous lucidity in your writing. I will directly grab your rss feed to stay privy of any updates. Admirable [url=http://pspgo.info/favorites.html]internet[/url] work and much success in your next topics!

25 avril 2010 à 15 h 16  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Hello

I just wanted to say hi :)

26 avril 2010 à 03 h 41  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

hi everybody


just signed up and wanted to say hello while I read through the posts


hopefully this is just what im looking for looks like i have a lot to read.

26 avril 2010 à 17 h 55  
Anonymous Anonyme a dit...

Hello folks,

What online zines do you read and would recommend?

For all you ska folks out there I recommend The Enough Fanzine. It is one of the first hardcore fanzines on the web.

They have throusands of reviews from the most underground bands all over the world. Check them out online: [url=http://www.enoughfanzine.com]Enough Fanzine[/url]. Best of it all, they are 100% non-profit and just helping the scene!

Looking forward to your recommendations.

Regards!

9 mai 2010 à 21 h 09  

Publier un commentaire

S'abonner à Publier des commentaires [Atom]

<< Accueil